Achieving True Work-Life Balance: My Journey

I used to hate the term “work-life balance.”

It felt like some mythical state of perfection. Everyone talked about it, but no one actually achieved it. This was especially true for someone like me. My passport collected stamps faster than most people collect coffee loyalty points.

For more than two decades, I traversed the African continent with only my suitcases. My UN career involved supporting countries and providing training. I crafted resilience policies and strategies. I also strengthened healthcare systems during never-ending crises.

My email signature listed impressive credentials. My calendar was perpetually double-booked. My sense of purpose felt unshakable.

And I was absolutely, completely exhausted.

What Work-Life Balance Actually Means

Looking back, I laugh at what I used to think “balance” meant. I would mentally check off tasks such as doing a yoga session before dawn. Check. FaceTime with family once a week? Done. Using meditation apps during flight delays? Practically enlightened!

This wasn’t balance. This was performative self-care while careening toward burnout.

True work-life balance isn’t about equal hours spent in different categories. It’s about being genuinely present wherever you are. It involves maintaining sufficient energy reserves to prevent constant exhaustion. It’s crucial to keep in mind the most important things, even when everything seems pressing.

A lesson I learned the hard way.

My Breaking Point (It Wasn’t What I Expected)

There was no dramatic collapse – no medical emergency or public meltdown that forced me to change.

Instead, my wake-up call came quietly during a pandemic video call. We were discussing emergency supply chains when my 5-year-old grandson appeared on screen during someone else’s update. He waved excitedly, showing off a drawing he’d made.

For that brief moment, everyone’s faces softened. We were no longer officials and experts—just humans, smiling at a child’s artistic triumph.

When we returned to discussing PPE shortages, I realized something profound. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d fully relaxed like that. I genuinely smiled without an agenda attached.

That evening, I noted in my journal, “How can I justify safeguarding global health systems if I’m compromising my own?”

5 Small Changes That Transformed Everything

My transformation didn’t happen overnight. It started with tiny rebellions against my own work habits:

1. Creating true boundaries: I stopped answering non-emergency emails after 7 PM. The world continued to function. In fact, people quickly adapted.
2. Embracing “good enough”: Perfectionism was killing me slowly. I began asking myself, “Will anyone notice if my work is 95% perfect instead of 100%?” Usually, the answer was no.
3. Building transition rituals: The line between work and home blurred when both happened in the same space. I started taking 20-minute walks after work hours to mentally “commute” home.
4. Scheduling joy first: I began blocking time for photography, local exploration, and Kyokushin Karate before filling my calendar with meetings. Treating personal time as equally important changed everything.
5. Measuring different metrics: I didn’t just track work accomplishments. I also started noting energy levels, sleep quality, and moments of genuine connection.

The Benefits I Never Expected

The changes in my well-being were predictable: better sleep, fewer headaches, and lower anxiety.

What surprised me were the professional benefits:

• My strategic thinking improved dramatically when I wasn’t perpetually exhausted
• Team members began approaching me with creative solutions instead of just problems
• My reputation shifted from “always available” to “consistently reliable.”
• I started receiving feedback about seeming more approachable and present

According to research that would have shocked my younger self, working longer hours rarely correlates with better outcomes. One Stanford study found productivity per hour declines sharply when a person works more than 50 hours weekly.

I’d been working twice as hard for diminishing returns.

Assessing Your Own Work-Life Balance

Before you can improve something, you need to understand where you stand. Ask yourself:

• Do you regularly sacrifice sleep to complete work?
• When was the last time you did something purely for enjoyment?
• How often do you feel fully present versus mentally somewhere else?
• Does your body feel chronically tense or worn out?
• Can you remember what you had for breakfast this morning?

Your answers reveal more about your work-life balance than any formal assessment ever could.

Finding Your Way Forward

Today, as I transition from international civil servant to entrepreneur and work-life balance coach, I apply these hard-won lessons daily. My digital agency focuses specifically on helping organizations implement humane work practices without sacrificing results.

Because here’s what two decades in high-pressure environments taught me: sustainability isn’t just an environmental concept. It applies to humans too.

The workers who remain in their positions aren’t constantly burning themselves out. They continue making meaningful contributions year after year. They’re the ones who recognize that effectiveness comes from renewal, not endless exertion.

If you’re struggling with your own work-life balance:

1. Start small. Take it one step at a time.
2. Be patient with yourself. Old habits die reluctantly.
3. Remember that balance looks different for everyone.
4. Understand that your balance will shift through different life seasons.

Work-life balance isn’t a destination. It’s an ongoing conversation with yourself about what matters most right now.

For me, watching Madagascar’s incomparable sunsets without checking my phone now feels as important as any policy I ever drafted. Perhaps it holds even more significance.

What small step could you take today toward better balance?

Drop a comment below—I respond personally to every one.